How to control your emotions in a healthy way?
A key lesson we learn in life is how to think through decisions, so that we can make rational choices instead of emotional ones.
When i had anger problems as a kid. At first I I didn’t care what anyone said. But I started getting more mature, and learned how to minimize “tantrums” and focusing on the bigger picture.
All emotions resonate at a measurable frequency. Lower emotions (sadness, fear, anger, disgust) resonate at lower frequencies compared to higher emotions such as compassion, gratitude, kindness, acceptance, love, & joy.
In business, making emotional decisions is a fast way to burn yourself. For example, If you invest in stocks or even crypto currency – you’ll find out for yourself that one of the worst things you can do is making emotional decisions.
And if you sell any products – whether physically or virtually you’ll find out also people buy using emotions and rationalize using logic.
It comes down to how much you use these emotions and you can sell anything: Hope, Trust, Excitement, and Urgency.
9 ways to handle emotions better
1: Feel your Emotions
The problem comes in when we have emotions/feelings and we shove them down and don’t allow them out.
The extreme is where whatever emotion you feel you react automatically – lacking self-awareness.
Pausing, taking Deep Breaths, becoming present in your body and allowing the emotions to be felt but in full control instead of hiding them is key.
First you make effort to understand what your triggers are and how to manage them.
Then take a moment to breathe and think things through logically.
It also makes sense to question and understand your thoughts, beliefs and emotions.
2: Don’t make permanent decisions based on temporary emotions
Most of the things we do have consequences we have to live with later. Our feeling can be fleeting.
E.g, Not taking the time to know someone before going into serious relationship.
Short term thinking and Immediate gratification – lead to quick emotional satisfaction.
When you have to make decisions, remember Emotions pass but decisions linger.
Learn how to take control of your life by making choices based on logic rather than emotion.
If you want to be taken seriously don’t say things out of emotions just for saying sake.
Don’t make promises when you’re excited. Take a moment to breathe and think things through logically when you’re overexcited.
3: Control your emotions
Control your emotions or they will control you
What emotion fuels you the most? Don’t let your emotions destroy your life.
Do you hate having to control your emotions?
Most decisions that come from an emotional place are usually wrong ones.
E.g Anger can be a double-edged sword.
Instead of allowing it control you use your anger in a conscious way and direct it into something worthwhile.
Being motivated by hatred, fear, or revenge can lead to pain in the future.
Acknowledge when you’ve made an emotional decision in the past and learn from it so you don’t make the same mistake again.
4: Discipline your emotions when making Financial decisions
A person either disciplines his finances or his finances disciplines him.
When you want to make a decision financially – ask yourself is this the most intelligent decision you can make in the moment?
5: Learn to Think for yourself
Can someone control your emotions?
I learned something powerful today on why we all should not see ourselves as followers but rather students – it helps you think for yourself.
If you can’t seem to make a decision, sometimes it’s best to just wait it out and see how you feel after some rest.“
Make sure the actions you take is the product of your own conclusions – Jim Rohn
Big signs you’re in emotional trouble:·
If you can’t make decisions on your own·
When you can’t Speak up when necessary·
Being conflict avoidant instead of looking on how to address problems.
6: Don’t let emotions get in the way of making Hard decisions
Making good decisions can also involve Hard decisions.
First you need to put yourself in other’s shoes – see things from another perspective
Then learn to make hard decisions.
Eg being in an Abusive relationship for long – then you know it might be time to make decisions that may break you heart but gives you peace.
When you’re undecided, list out the positive and negative aspects of each option to help you come to a conclusion.
7: Focus on the bigger picture
Say your child makes a huge mistake.
Your tone and the words you use say a lot on whether you believed in the child in the first place.
Think of the outcome you desire from people and any situation you find yourself rather than just the moment.
Let it control your emotions, thoughts, actions and habits.
8: Get Emotionally Detached to Results
Between action and results – the only thing that you can control in your life is action.
When you’re emotionally attached rewards, it negatively impacts the action you’re meant to take.
One thing I’ve learned from focusing on process instead of results is:
Fall in love with the action not the reward
9: Asking for help:
Don’t be afraid to speak to a Coach, therapist or counselor about your emotional decisions.
The key is in Choosing which emotions to embrace and which to leave behind.
The ones that serve you best and those which keep you from becoming your best self makes a difference in your wellbeing and results in life.