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Personal Development

Unlock Your Full Potential: 8 Powerful Strategies to Choose Purpose Over Pleasure

What role does pleasure play in our lives as compared to our purpose? And how much does too much of it drift you away from your purpose.

There’s an association between pain and pleasure.

Dopamine (craving molecule) was created to help us seek things that are beneficial for us in the long term and give us pleasure in the short term.

Purpose over pleasure meaning

At a certain age in life – it makes sense to prioritize purpose over pleasure.

When people get addicted to any pleasure – even the usual day-day activities or responsibilities now feel like more pain.

The brain moves to quench this pain with as much pleasure as it can find.

It’s easy to default to the nearest source of pleasure when things get rough or difficult.

Think of a kid binging on a video games so he can pretend to forget his difficult homework.

Then the extremes like seeking random low-commitment but sexually rewarding relationships to hold on to when having hard times with long-term relationships.

Why pleasure is important

Pleasure has its its place!

We can’t underplay the importance of pleasure in crucial life events such as sex and reproduction, food and satiation and the reward pathway of general life events.

But how much pleasure is enough?

8 ways to prioritize living with purpose over pleasure

1: Make your purpose your primary drive

You fall into trouble whenever there’s a confusion between which is driving you – purpose or pleasure.

The latter is a bad master but good slave.

Even if you haven’t yet “found your purpose” – make sure your actions align with your highest priorities.

There’s a quote “Men without purpose seek fulfillment by chasing pleasure. And with a life towards you purpose, can make a plan.

What are your goals? What steps do you need to take to achieve them

When you have a plan, it’s easier to stay focused on your goals and resist the temptation to veer off course.

It is not enough to simply have a plan – you must also take action and put your plan into motion.

2: Do hard things

Successful people do the things that failures don’t want to do. They focus on their long term goals over instant pleasure.

One of the biggest distractions we face in life is avoiding pain.

We know pushing through and engaging in challenges plus going the extra mile is hard.

Think of feeling stuck, and allowing the dreaded procrastination take over.

We look for the closest distraction in form of pleasure to hide from pain.

The secret in choosing to do the hard things when necessary makes life in the future easier.

Life is suffering and many people pursue the fast life:

-porn
-drugs
-stealing
-cheating

In order for you to overcome the pain of life, you must find a larger-than-life dream to devote yourself to. – Vikash

3: Work when you work

One of the most powerful principle I learned in productivity is to work when you work and play when you play.

This is the price worth paying to steer towards your purpose. Doing both at the same time is a sacrifice of achieving excellence that’s not worth it.

4: Create a Healthy Balance of Pleasure and Pain by Setting Limits

Your life’s purpose absolutely includes joy and pleasure … a life without any form of pleasure is not just dull but is devoid of hope.

Think of an intimate relationship without physical contact or sex.

But without setting limits, we hit our dopamine peak and cause it to reset to a higher point.

So with time, you need higher stimulation to meet the same need or reward.

The healthy balance is knowing when “its enough” in whatever you’re trying to build as against chasing empty wind.

Only then can you give yourself permission to do things just for the fun of it.

5: Create Accountability and Find a Role model

Having accountability is a sure way to get closer to your purpose.

And they can tell you when you’re drifting away from your goals e.g. a Coach, Family or close Friends.

Also, who are you looking up to? If you’re struggling to prioritize living with purpose, it can be helpful to find a role model.

One who is living the life you want to live can be a great source of inspiration and motivation.

So its easier to see what’s possible for you

6: Live in the present moment

It’s easy to get caught up in the past or the future, but the only moment you have is now.

Learn to appreciate the present moment and live in it as much as possible.

Intentionally bring focus to everything you do with an accepting nature.

Find joy in the simple pleasures.

7: No one is coming to save you

The last time I felt like shit as a result of indulgences – i remembered there was no one that felt the shame, disgust and hurt but myself alone.

The media and everybody promote pleasure as both a sales and entertainment technique, but the effects of being overstimulated are faced alone.

The ultimate enemy is the pain of drowning in pleasure while starving for purpose.

8: Think Long term

Chasing random pleasure is short-term.

Short term pleasure nearly always results in long term suffering.⁣

The ability to choose long term goals over the short term pleasure is a life hack.

 

 

 

Categories
Lifestyle Personal Development

7 things I found that gives a sense of purpose and meaning

One way to motivate yourself to do anything is to develop a sense of purpose and meaning. What is something you do that adds meaning and purpose to your life?

No one wants to go through life feeling empty.

Defining your purpose is the first step to gaining clarity in life.

A sense of purpose meaning

It is referred to as “ikigai” in Japan. It alludes to the practice of establishing a specific aim each morning.

This is any thing you do or engage in that gives you a sense of fulfillment and joy.

It is part of our spiritual needs amongst other things like authentic self expression, time in nature, safe connections, finding true love etc.

Daily sense of purpose leads to wellbeing and, according to study, is also a factor in lifespan.

What gives you a sense of purpose?

In my early teens, I found meaning and purpose through music, pursuing goals and entrepreneurship.

I’ve grown and evolved; some are still part of the list but now in different priorities: Family, health, quality relationships, nurturing my soul, setting goals & accomplishments and overcoming obstacles give me the most meaning and purpose today.

How do you find purpose and meaning for your life?

7 things I found that gives a sense of meaning and purpose:

1. Family

In today’s hustle culture we attribute “success” to doing well in career and finances.

But it doesn’t just have to be related to money; success is also found in how well you’ve created and nurtured strong relationships and been of value to others in your family and community.

I was unhappy the most when I didn’t accept and prioritize the unconditional love my family gave to me.

It made me hold a lot of grudges at such period against my parents particularly my Dad. I felt he didn’t do “enough.”

But frankly, he’s been himself and would always do his best to his abilities and knowledge.

Put your family first

Success is spending time with family.

You didn’t succeed if you were grinding away at work for years, with your head down, to buy a big house and obtain an important job title only to look up and find your friends and family missing or left behind.

Design your life around your business, family & hobbies if you want to live life on your own terms and achieve freedom.

Can your family hold you back?

Sometimes, we struggle with unstable families and personal relationships. Fact is You don’t choose the family you’re born into. But you do choose the family you create.

Too often we battle with family members telling us what we should be doing or not doing especially in terms of taking risks – but realize that this is out of love.

And they don’t have to agree with your ideas or vision.

You may feel the whole world is against you… but you can decide to move to a different environment and grow into the person that you want to become.

Or still, you can disappear for 6 months, change your circle and transform your life.

2. Good health

I don’t have a “perfect health”, but you value your health the most when you lose it.

One of my mission in life is to help people especially entrepreneurs like me stay healthy doing what they love.

Your health is closely related to your lifestyle choices and you take control of your health through better lifestyle choices.

Each little habit is a vote for or against your health. It all adds up in the end.

Health is the greatest wealth

When you rethink fortune wealth is also found in good health, mental health/clarity, self care.

The goal is to become financially stable without neglecting your health

Take personal responsibility for your health

The sooner you realize that your health is a personal responsibility, the better. You can start with studying nutrition books and journals and implement what works for you.

Most times, you can’t explain randomly how broken our food & health system is – until people study for themselves.

Largely because of how much media they consume and have been made to believe. Studying seems to be a solution.

Health affects everything

Health, just like wealth is something that affects everybody we like it or not.

The goal is to move from being insecure and unconfident about your body & health to being confident and spending each day with mental clarity working toward your goals. ⁣

The saying is true, “Success in one thing leads to success in others.” For Example: 

Success in your health leads to –> success in your relationships –> Wealth ⁣

3. Quality relationships 

It involves connecting with others and forming deep, meaningful relationships with the most important people in your life.

It’s beyond sexual relationships to how much deep and quality relationship  you have.

Are all your friends “acquaintances” that would run away immediately they get what they need from you.

I can tell you no matter how much money you make – you still judge the quality of your life by the quality of relationships you have.

Success is something you attract by the person you become.

It applies also to relationships and business: The partner you attract, clients you work with are often a reflection of yourself.

Ditch limiting beliefs, raise your standards.

Do a reciprocity audit in your relationships

You can’t make someone love you by giving them more of what they already don’t appreciate.

In business, develop close and enduring Relationships (to Employees & customers). Ditch Relationships that no longer serve your vision.

Harsh truth, some relationships are seasonal, some will likely last for a lifetime… but all have shaped me to become a better person.

Have healthy boundaries

Lack of boundaries in your relationships can make others irresponsible but happy and leave you miserable and responsible.

You don’t need people who can’t adhere to any boundaries or healthy relationship rules at all.

I once saw this quote on how relationships work:

“Chemistry gets it started
Similar value keeps it going
Shared vision makes it last”

I’ll add “Minimum effort destroys it all.” Got to keep making emotional deposits else your account goes dry.

4. Service

If you want more purpose in life, focus on service to others. I’m an introvert; I can tell you how much I love my own company.

But no lies, I find myself the most every time I lose myself to something greater than myself.

How do you put service to others into action

Focus in impacting the lives of others.

The world needs people who want to make a positive impact now more than ever.

You don’t need to be an “Expert.” You just need to be a chapter ahead!

Russell Brunson hit the nail on the head in “Expert Secrets” –

“You don’t have to be the most knowledgeable person in the world on your topic, you just have to be one chapter ahead of the people you’re helping..”

The first impact I made on others, was teaching other kids like me. No I wasn’t the smartest. First I was amongst the those that couldn’t catch things fast.

Then I stumbled into Entrepreneurship; it made me take more responsibilities and I’m still learning.

If you wake up every day and try to be as impactful as possible you will always win.

Even if you just manage to have an impact on one person that is a huge achievement. And the more you try and be impactful the more lives you will change.

5. Your Soul – faith & hope.

I believe without nurturing our souls we lose purpose and direction in life. It encompasses our Relationship with God, faith and love for him and others around us.

Lately I’m beginning to notice the level of my happiness is indirectly proportional to how much I feel hopeless.

Your Soul is Priceless 

Our souls are among the most priceless things we have to know our purpose

Some habits decrease hope and faith:

  • Doing things that go against our values
  • Engaging in habits that directly tarnish our souls
  • Speaking words that do not edify our souls
  • Confessing negative (plus spreading negativity)
  • Blaming others for our problems (as against taking responsibility)
  • Playing reactive as against being proactive.

“Hope guides me. It is what gets me through the day and especially the night.” – Knight’s tale.

6. Setting goals and a sense of accomplishment

Setting goals and working towards them, no matter how small or large gives us a sense of purpose.

Can you remember your first sale or dollar online?

When you crush said yes?

Seeing the numbers of your successful company a year or two after

Accomplishing that goal you’ve been dreaming of.

7. Overcoming obstacles can give us a sense of purpose

Overcoming difficulties can be empowering and give you strength to face other challenges. It is the reason people are more confident when they get more competent in life.

Overcoming obstacles gives us a sense of meaning, joy and fulfillment.

Everybody goes through these challenges and obstacles, but those who succeed are the ones who fight through it and stay persistent.⁣⁣

You’ve got to get out of your own way:

  • Challenge your inner critic
  • Add up to your level of expertise by increasing your knowledge in both learning and action.
  • Stay positive: It’s critical to replace any negative thoughts with positive ones in order to keep oneself motivated to keep trying no matter what obstacles arise.

CONCLUSION

If you feel stuck then there is ONLY ONE way to get out and live the life you’re dreaming about… You need to find your purpose and get clear about the next steps in your life.

Life gets dull when we live too easily, when we live without challenges. It is the challenges that help us grow and keep us lively.

So we should consider the problems and challenges as motivators for moving forward in life. Without challenges, we become complacent, life becomes boring and purposeless.

You are responsible to do what brings you a sense of happiness, purpose, and meaning.